Robbie Williams Is A Guy You've Never Heard Of (And Will Also Play One!)

Alleged pop star Robbie Williams (pictured above rehearsing the moves he will use during his inevitable throwdown with a tranny hooker in a London alleyway) has been signed to play an alcoholic drifter turned humanitarian. Since I'm undoubtedly not the only one struggling to find a reason not to off myself due to boredom, read about it:

"An alcoholic drifter, Charles was found in London in 1975 and thought to be dead having consumed large amounts of industrial alcohol. He was about to be zipped into a body bag, moved slightly and was transferred to hospital instead.

He has spent the last twenty eight years helping alcoholics by running help lines and day centres. In 1989 he opened the "Chaucer Clinic" and has treated over 15,000 alcoholics in his career."

I'm not really sure why I would like or want to watch a movie about a person like this Nick Charles character. Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't sloppy drunks one of the most time-honored forms of human entertainment? Who among us hasn't seen an alky, passed out face-down on the sidewalk and paused to giggle uncontrollably for a few minutes? We act like we don't want to kick him, but we all do.

Right? Anyone with me on the physically abusing defenseless drunks? No?