Trailer Report: STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN WILL KILL YOU ON AN ISLAND OF PAIN

Though Christmas is long over, occasionally the Gods will bestow a great and wondrous gift upon humanity that transcends our narrow-minded concepts of "holidays," "giving," or "former wrestlers killing people on an island." Yes, that's right, the hilariously abusive and allegedly famous Stone Cold Steve Austin has somehow skanked his way into a starring role in the upcoming feature, The Condemned.

While you may have been expecting a touching romantic comedy or a mission to save baby Jesus, The Condemned is all about what Stone Cold does best: fuck people up. He's a killer, and he has to kill other killers on an island while people elsewhere watch a broadcast of the killing killers. KILL.

MySpace Exclusive: The Condemned Trailer